How We Consciously Hurt Ourselves
And why we do the things that hurt us
We all know what’s good for us, and what, on the contrary, destroys our plans and poses a serious health risk. Smoking, unhealthy food, alcohol abuse, sedentary lifestyle, missing opportunities and devaluing our efforts — these are a few of what we should avoid in order to live a full and prosperous life.
However, we continue eating fast-food and ignoring all the chances to change our lives for the better. And here’s a question, and besides the fair one: “Why do we continue doing the things that we know that are harmful for us?”
Why cannot we resist destructive behavior patterns?
We all indulge in behavior that, as we know well, affects us negatively. There are few reasons why we continue hurting ourselves consciously
1. Bad habits give us essential comfort.
The first reason is directly connected with our need to feel comfortable and we do anything we can in order to achieve this condition.
Every action we take has its own purpose, even though we can’t be aware of it. And one of the most prevalent hidden purposes is comfort.
Our brain is programmed for gratification, and our “gratification” is a feeling of comfort, that, in turn, causes the release of dopamine or the “hormone of well-being”. This is exactly what gets us literally “addicted” to destructive actions and makes us connect our well-being to the destructive habits.
This explains why it is so difficult for us to stop ourselves: feeling of comfort makes us forget about negative consequences of our actions. In other words, peculiar “reward” attracts us, though we all know that it will negatively affect us in the long-term.
For instance, smoking in between work makes our brain associate this habit with rest, chance to go outside, talk to colleagues or, on the contrary, stay alone. Alcohol consuming can be connected with your desire to relax and have a good time after a busy working week. Considerations on attending gym or any other sports clubs are displaced by “more rewarding” thought that one can sit on the couch and watch favorite TV series.
2. People around us do it too.
We also tend to rationalize our behavior if the society finds it acceptable at all. If those around us do the same things that we do, then we calmly stop worrying about the consequences. It is not hard to find or even come up with socially acceptable destructive habits. They can be, for instance, harmful snacks, missing the gym or smoking. Vast majority behave the similar way, and one may have a question: Why can’t I afford the same?
It causes inner rationalization when it comes to unhealthy habits such as “one more time won’t hurt” or “I had a tough day so I had better finish it the next week”. These excuses have come from feeling of guilt for we do not make decisions that turn into benefits in the long run.
3. Our brain finds reasons confirming our decisions.
You are unlikely to be unfamiliar with numerous stories such as “My grandpa smoked a pack of cigarettes a day and lived to be 90 years old” or “My friend ate whatever they wanted, didn’t do any sports and still had a nice body”. We love to find evidence confirming our decisions whether they are constructive or destructive. The idea rarely crosses our mind that the people in these stories were just lucky. They might have had strong genetics or active lifestyle “saved” their lives. At every opportunity we try to do what hurts us hoping for a favorable outcome.
4. We only think of momentary harm.
Majority of people know about the consequences of their destructive actions. Cigarette packs have warnings about what happens to smokers. Various videos on how alcohol can change a person are freely available. We all see very well in real life examples of what can happen to those who eat junk food while leading a sedentary lifestyle. Motivating articles warn us that the chance to radically change our lives can be caught only once and missing it can simply play a cruel joke with us. However, we continue to harm ourselves with enviable persistence. This is because we don’t think about real, long-term consequences.
Of course, a cigarette won’t kill. And a portion of fast food in the nearest cafe can’t make us suddenly get fat. But as soon as we multiply the negative actions several times and calculate the real number of actions that harm us, that we do, for instance, for a year, the situation can change significantly.
Most of the negative consequences can be subtle and gradual — such that we will not notice them for a long time and be able to drive away all thoughts of possible harm.
